Work work.

Hello little tiny mini man.

I love you so much.

U actually survive for 11 months. with us.

And i am so glad i am still alive too.

Baby con u r turning 1 soon.

Ur mama sorta kana fired by ur grandma.

I am working for her at 150 dollar a day as a chef.

The workload is crazy.

And i can help ease ur dada burden.

But u got HFMD for 2 weeks.

So i cant work for that 2 weeks.

And they sorta pissed and wanna cut my salary.

Mama working outside at 8dollar/ hour now.

Feel like pathetic.

But.. i am happier.

Stress free.

Know more people. None can be my friend YET.

and know more places. and know more things.

I wanna give u everything my lil man.

i love you so much.

I kiss ur feet everyday.

I smell ur ass too.

My lil baby.

MUACKS.

Overflowing love

Hello my baby con. Mama haven been blogging lately. Mama started working now. So tired. Every morning wake up wait for ur tardy dada to come and fetch me to infant care. Previously when he didn't fetch me I have to carry ur luggage and u and climb the stupid uphill near my house in order to reach infant care. Now ur dada fetch me so much more better. Can sleep for 30 more minutes. After work rush home and bath. About 5 plus den start crochet. Mama set up 2 online shop to sell my handmade dolls. So far no business yet. Until 6.15 have to prep aND go climb the damn hill to fetch u again. The walk back is tedious. It's like my leg muscle gonna explode. Plus u getting fatter and fatter everyday. Once home will bath u feed u and den play with u for a while. Sometimes gong gong which is my dad. Will bring u out for a walk. Den he play with u from 8 plus until 9 which is when ur dada reach my house. Soon we be able to live together. 😆 whatever it is... no matter how tiring and how fat u become .. mama gonna carry u mama gonna love u til I die. My precious conman. Muacks hugging u to sleep. My little tiny baby.

Teething con

Hello connor boy. Mama working now. Do you know u been hospitalized for 1 day last week. U suddenly vomit lots of milk all over my bed. I nv knew teething can cause this. So we got scared and drove you to hospital. Doctor say must admit u. So sad. Mama stay with us throughout the night. So shag. Now I put u at childcare. The childcare called and asked me to bring u home cause u diarhhea 3 times already. Hais. Ur grandma went home early so she took u home. My dearest con. I love u. Faster teeth finish okay. Notti man.

Connor injured!

Hi Connor!

Yesterday you injured yourself. Not the first time. But this time you injured yourself on my knee.

You were on the bed and I was sitting on it guarding it as usual... Then you came over, slipped and knocked your chin on my knee.

Didn't know what was happening as I picked you up for a consoling hug, until I saw the blood on your shirt. Then your mouth. Then my shirt. OMG.

But after you calmed down, you were back to your happy self again, albeit a little afraid of me (What >.< You came and hit my knee!)

And that's good Connor. And I hope this rate of recovery continues throughout your life. Because we will fall, and we will get hurt. Physically, mentally and emotionally. As a parent my role is never to teach you how never to get hurt, but how to minimize getting hurt and more importantly, how to recover from a fall.

These few months you've been grabbing the bed guard (the blue fence thingy in mama's pictures) and getting up. And falling down. And getting up. And this is good. Often times between starting and success is a whole bunch of failures. The Chinese had a saying, that success is birthed from failures. And they are absolutely right. Put in another way, if you never try because you are afraid of failing, then you will never succeed.

Of course, there will be times when you succeed on your first try. But as the years go on you will realize that is more the exception than the rule. Don't ever let fear rule you, because the day you do, you will end up in a smaller shell and your growth will stop.

OK, too much preachy Dad.

I just want to end this note by letting you know that, no matter what, I will always love you. And though I will always wait to see if you can get up by your own powers after you fall, I will always be around to help you up when you can't. And dust you off a little, check the seriousness of your wounds, before giving you a big grin and a big thumbs up as I send you back to your business. Be it play, love or work.

Connor boy @ childcare

Hello baby con.

Today is the first day i put you at childcare.

Mama and dada paid 3k for this.

TO suffer!!!

Grandma says i cannot work yet.

cause cannot just dump u there and leave.

But childcare doesnt allow me to stay for long.

The moment i pass you to the caretaker,

they put u on the floor.

You eyes become sparkling.

Eat carpet.

Eat toys.

And play with mirror.

You seems so happy, you didnt even look at me once.

I squat down at a corner, watching you.

And after an hour or so, the caretaker kept saying i can leave.

i assume they just wanna kick me out and start abusing you!!

so i left, and hid behind the door and theres a small glass panel..

i watch you.. and my heart broke.

i loiter around the block... feel like crying.

I cant believe i dump u there!!

My heart ache..

But... mama need to work soon.

Mama have only 100 in bank.

Dada is broke from buying milk powder and theres a car to support.

I went home..

Thought i could finally sleep without you punching me

pulling my hair

stepping on my stomach and boobs.

or you slapping my face.

But i couldnt.

after an hour or so i fell asleep hugging your VERY smelly pillow.

And now it is wash and drying.

Every second with you brings me joy.

i love you so much.

You r the greatest gift i ever receive.

from god. not from your dada.

Baby con.. please love me when you grow up.

love me like how i love you.

remember to hug me when i grow old.

my lil man.

Love you lots.

Connor boy 1 on 1 with fan.

So cute!

Mama bought lots of ball ball for you, Mini ball ball land at home!

Free tent from buying hell lots of diapers.

Save me Connor boy

Hello Connor boy..

you just learn crawling

and u refused to sleep at night

even though ur eyes are like red and blood shotted.

Mama dying here too.

I am so shag..

i feel like a zombie..

save me connor boy!!

go to sleep!!

if u r not so cute.. i would have punch u and make u faint.

=P

too bad.

Every day I am able to watch you grow, is like a privilege.

Shitty Baby

Hello my little shitty baby.

You're having diarrhea again.

And u shit all over the place!!

Dunno izzit the diaper too small or too big.

We went out to some shopping mall,

and while mama ordering drinks and cake.. your dada come rushing

and have a stern, dying looking face.

'HE SHIT' den i was like... 'shit lah no big deal'

'NO he shit all over the place!' den i look around.

Dada shirt

Dada pants

Hip carrier

all shit!!

So we faster went to the baby room...

and i told the coffee bean guy to hold my drinks.

that time i even remind them for more whip cream.

Bought a shirt for dada to change.

Went back to coffee bean and saw our order...

my whip cream melted!

no more!!

so sad.

Went home.. on the way home.. you shit..

on the car seat.

Went home scrub the fuck out of me..

Squat down on floor and scrub the hip carrier,

your shirt x 2

dada shirts..

Almost died.

Den... at night.. 5am..

u dun wanna sleep.....

so i put u on my lap...

Tada~ shit all over again.....

U lil shitty baby.

On a happier note.

You just learn to crawl.

Dada say u learning how to hump.

well whatever.

Now u crawling like super duper fast.

We have to go around searching for baby bed guard. blaablaa

we also put u in a bouncer.. u seems so happy inside.

It cost $200 though.

And u this naughty baby, the toys i buy for u, u play 1 day dun wan already.

So we decided not to buy!

=P

See ur face.. so naughty!!

Cute lil man

Precious little baby

Hello baby con..
Ur mama, me is on diet. Skip breakfast today. Eat a piece of watermelon for lunch.. and a proper meal for dinner... den... 4 am... Maggie mee.. snacks.. and fried nugget.. bleah.. everyone around me keep saying I fat.. =( so sad. I was looking at you sleeping.. u r so small..so tiny.. I looked at ur baby photo... newborn I mean.. u still a baby right now.. u r so tiny. I can't help. I need to protect u this tiny little thing. I wonder how come some woman can just dump their newborn baby like that. U r so cute and tiny. U need protection. Mama will protect u with my live. U like to flip on ur stomach and sleep recently. Getting kinda stress. U flip I turn u flip I turn u flip I dun turn u cry.-_-. Naughty little thing. Haha love u baby.. love u so much.

Cherish

Hello little baby con.

I love you.

You seems to grow up fast.

I suddenly worried, that i might not be able to sleep with you on a single bed.

might not be able to carry u in my arms.

might not have to feed u cause u eat on ur own.

....

I must.. cherish all this moment now.

I love you baby.